


Not A Perfect Person

by STARSdidathing



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angry Tony Stark, Cuddling & Snuggling, Established Relationship, Feels, Fights, Happy Ending, Hurt Tony Stark, Light Angst, Loki (Marvel) Does What He Wants, Loki (Marvel) Feels, Loki (Marvel) Gets a Hug, Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, M/M, Mistakes, Not Canon Compliant, POV Alternating, Post-Avengers (2012), Tony Needs a Hug, Tony Stark Feels, Tony Stark Gets a Hug, Trickster Loki (Marvel), Wordcount: 1.000-5.000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-22
Updated: 2020-02-22
Packaged: 2021-02-28 04:20:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,085
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22837705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/STARSdidathing/pseuds/STARSdidathing
Summary: Loki is up to his old tricks again, but this time he miscalculates and angers someone incredibly precious to him.And that might be a price too high, even for him.
Relationships: Loki/Tony Stark
Comments: 42
Kudos: 644





	Not A Perfect Person

**Author's Note:**

> So this came about because I wanted to play around with the moments when the boys _aren't_ perfect together. When their actions and reactions don't mesh perfectly.
> 
> Hope you like :)

The trick was simply too good to pass up. Loki merely need to feign betrayal, steal a few items, double-cross an enemy or two and pretend to seduce someone. When it was complete, Loki could walk out of it with a magic text he coveted and some interesting technology he knew his lover would enjoy.

It wasn’t meant to spiral so drastically out of control when Thor got involved and when his duplicity was revealed (before it was meant to, before he could _explain_ ). He’d barely been able to do anything but hold his plans together in order to escape with his head attached and the items he wanted in his possession.

He knew Anthony would be displeased with him, but Loki had intended to make it up to him with the gift he’d stolen. He hadn’t thought Anthony would be angry, that he would truly mind what had occured - but when Loki appeared in the penthouse Anthony wasn’t happy to see him. Anthony _glared_ at him, so much vicious anger in his eyes that Loki almost stepped backwards.

“What the fuck are _you_ doing here?” Anthony spat. “Thought you had other people to spend your fucking time with?”

“Anthony,” Loki tried, giving him a smile and moving to step forward.

“No, you know what, fuck you,” Anthony snapped. “Fuck you and get the fuck out.”

Loki flinched, physically recoiling before quickly trying to sooth his lover. “Anthony, I admit things got out of hand but-”

“You pretended to betray us; you pretended to _seduce_ someone else. You lied to me.”

“I never lied-”

“No, you _obfuscated_. Would you have even told me what you did if it hadn’t come out by accident?” Loki hesitated, honestly unsure of his own answer, and that brief pause just made Anthony’s eyes harden further. “Yeah, like I thought.”

“Anthony-” Loki tried again, taking a half-step closer.

“No,” Anthony hissed. “We’re done, _Liesmith_. Get the fuck out.”

The word felt like a physical slap; a reminder of centuries of trying to explain and never being believed, never being able to _repent_ when his guilt had already been decided and his trick had found him too deep to dig himself out.

It made his heart... crack and he barely kept his face from falling before he was teleporting away, _fleeing_ to the apartment he hadn’t used in several months. He arrived in front of the table where the items he stole for Anthony sat, resting innocently but making his heart flare with pain, regret and fear.

He’d never seen Anthony so furious. 

He’d also never _once_ heard Anthony say that Loki could come back.

The realisation felt like a blade through his chest, an emotional agony that ripped into him and left him gasping. He felt horror sweep through him. _I’ve lost him_ , his mind whispered. _I... I made a mistake._

And Anthony was not the type of man prone to forgiving.

* * *

When Tony woke up in the morning, he was still half-asleep as he stretched out his arm, looking for the warmth and familiarity of his lover, but the bed was empty. It made his brow furrow. He blinked open his eyes, but found nothing but the cold sheets that showed him that he was alone and had been alone all night.

It only took a few moments for the memories to return. His fury had been drained by a long night in the lab beating metal into submission and working out his rage. He felt a small pain instead, a longing for Loki and a tiny spike of regret for just... yelling at the other man.

He’d been so angry when everything had tumbled out; he’d known in an instant that it was all an elaborate trick, the kind that Loki had often told him about when they were lying in bed; when Loki had been young and wickedly proud for pulling the wool over everyone’s eyes and laughing through the consequences without a care.

Tony had shaken his head and laughed too, able to appreciate the genius of his lover’s manipulations.

It had only _stung_ when those manipulations had included him. Loki hadn’t lied to his face, hadn’t done anything to personally betray Tony, but he’d kept him out of the loop, fucking _pretended to seduce_ someone and Tony had known that it was all a lie, never doubted that for a moment. But it fucking _stung_. It was like a slap to the face that Loki hadn’t even thought to tell him - to _trust_ him.

He knew there could have been a fucking good reason why he didn’t, but Tony had been so _angry_ and _hurt_ that when Loki had teleported into the room without a care in the world; acting the same way he had for centuries when he’d pulled a trick, Tony had lashed out; wanting to hurt and anger Loki the way he’d hurt and angered Tony. He’d wanted to make him realise; _you can’t fucking do this shit without consequences, you fucking asshole._

He had thought Loki would fight back, not flee. It had left Tony without a target and so he’d headed for the lab. 

He’d kind of... he’d thought Loki would come back, would wake him tentatively and weather his anger, let Tony shout a bit and then explain.

But the bed was empty.

Tony sat up and looked around the room, but there was no sign of his lover. 

“J?” He questioned. “Is Loki here?”

“No, Sir,” his A.I. told him quietly and it made that small shard of regret and guilt spread a little bit wider. 

It made Tony sigh and run a hand through his hair before climbing out of bed. He needed coffee if he was going to feel guilty for being justifiably angry at Loki. 

He barely made it out of his room before his plans derailed as spreading out across his bar was a vast array of _amazing_ technology. The kind of technology owned by the people Loki had been tricking and scheming his way into the good graces of. It made Tony swallow around a suddenly dry throat as he stepped close and ran his hands over them. He knew Loki couldn’t have cared less about this kind of stuff, he also knew that some of it was technology that Loki had to have stolen at the _start_ of his plan, before it had all gone downhill.

He’d chosen to steal tech for Tony, because he’d known he’d want it.

The thought sent a burst of warmth and affection through Tony’s chest; it was the kind of feeling that always found him forgiving Loki even when he probably should have held out longer. 

It was only when he was halfway down the bar that he found a single scrape of parchment. There were two words, written in Loki’s elegant scrawl, “ _I’m sorry_.”

The message sent another shard through Tony’s heart and he half expected to turn around and see his lover behind him, apologetic and wary; uncertain if he would be forgiven. But there was no one there, the penthouse was empty and silent.

“Fuck,” Tony hissed under his breath before looking up at the gift and apology strewn over his bar.

He really wished he’d heard Loki out, told the mage to stop and talk to him next time he wanted to trick people. He just hoped Loki returned soon so they could _both_ apologise and fix things. They’d been together too long to let this break them apart.

* * *

_We’re done, Liesmith. Get the fuck out._

The words echoed in Loki’s mind, making his heart clench painfully and leaving him at a loss. His tricks and lies had always found him in trouble, but never like this, never with an unexpected consequence and a price that was so high. _Too high._

Loki would do anything to reverse what he’d done, but he didn’t know how, didn’t know if he’d be welcome and so he stayed away.

He couldn’t bear to hear his lover yell, ignore and reject him again. He couldn’t bear to have his heart break twice.

Anthony was through with him, he’d finally pushed his lover too far, finally... finally proven he was _not_ worth the love, trust and affectionate that Anthony had offered him. He had ruined everything and all for the sake of a few items; all because he couldn’t resist a perfect opportunity. 

_We’re done, **Liesmith**._

Not Loki, not babe, not Lokes, not even _Reindeer Games_.

Liesmith.

Loki hadn’t known how much that would crack his heart until he realised it was the last name his lover would ever call him - no, his _former_ lover. Because how could Loki reverse it? How could he repent? How could he win Anthony back?

Loki had spent months considering and discarding ideas; only ever getting so far as preparing to teleport before a new fear, a new way Anthony would say ‘ _no_ ’ appeared. When he would say, ‘ _get the fuck out_ ’ and confirm that Loki was never welcome in Anthony’s home or life again.

Loki couldn’t appear until he was certain he could win him. (But Loki never won, could never make people believe him when it mattered. No one he cared for ever stayed, ever chose him, ever _forgave_. He always pushed them too far, he always lost them. Loki _always_ lost.)

He was still trying to come up with something to do or say when the one thing he had dreaded from the start happened.

Someone attacked the city and the Avengers were called to fight. 

Someone attacked and without Loki there to keep a careful eye on his lover and layer him with wards, Anthony was in danger.

Loki had never teleported so quickly to his lover’s location. Anthony was outnumbered, there were explosions and fireballs and Loki barely noticed the burns blistering his skin as he cut and slew anything in his path. He caught the brunt of an explosion and gained a deep slash in his arm, but he hardly blinked. Loki didn’t _care_ as he fought to reach and stand before his trapped and tired love; to protect him with every weapon and spell that he had. 

Anthony was soon able to assist when the enemies were thinned. He used his rebooted suit to fire his repulsors and lift into the sky. They were able to _win_.

In the aftermath Loki swayed on his feet, feeling Anthony come up beside him and clasp his arm, his faceplate having risen and his eyes wide.

“Loki,” he murmured, “What are you...? You came back?”

 _Loki_ , hearing his name from Anthony’s lips sent warmth through him, it made him slump with relief. It made him fall forward, being caught by Anthony and instantly making Loki’s hands grip the armour as his forehead found Anthony’s shoulder.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, all the words he’d carefully rehearsed for months disappearing as soft, desperate confessions spilled out of him. “I never should have lied to you. I wanted to explain. I wanted... wanted to return. I didn’t want you to tell me to leave. I didn’t want to hear you say _no_ , say you couldn’t... that you didn’t-”

“Shh,” Anthony hushed him, he heard the sound of a part of Anthony’s armour retracting before his hand was gently touching Loki’s hair and brushing it back from his face. “It’s okay, babe.”

 _Babe_ , Loki slumped further against Anthony and held him tighter.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered again, achingly raw and vulnerable. “Please, let me fix it. Please, don’t tell me to leave.”

He felt a soft kiss get pressed to the top of his head, before Anthony promised him, “Not going to tell you to leave again, Loki. You’re coming back to the tower with me.”

Loki closed his eyes, relief surging through him so strongly that he was lucky that Anthony was holding him up, especially when the rush of adrenaline and fear faded, leaving him light-headed and passing out with nothing but Anthony keeping him standing.

* * *

Getting Loki back to the tower had been slightly difficult and involved telling SHIELD and the Avengers that they could either let him go or have him _make_ them let him go. They’d eventually allowed him to fly off with Loki in his arms. When he’d arrived at the penthouse he’d made a beeline for the bedroom. He’d placed the mage on the mattress with a soft, pained look, having spent way too long without the demi-god in their bed.

He’d then stripped himself from the suit and careful begun the long familiar process of getting Loki out of his armour. It was harder with Loki as an immobile lump covered in small to large injuries, but he managed it. He also got Loki’s wounds dressed and bandaged and pulled him into some of the mage’s old baggy clothes that had remained throughout his departure.

When he was done, Tony had removed his undersuit, changed into something he could sleep in and carefully climbed into bed to curl around his lover. 

He rested his head on Loki’s uninjured shoulder, one arm around his waist and breathed in the scent of the man he’d missed so badly during their time apart.

It hadn’t all been solved in a moment, Tony wasn’t naive enough to think that, but right now he was just _grateful_ to have Loki back beside him. They both had a lot of talking to do, but it could wait until Loki was awake and healed.

For now, Tony just closed his eyes and fell asleep easily for the first time in months.

* * *

When Loki woke up, he swore he was dreaming; he could feel the warmth of someone pressed against him. His mind instantly categorised it as _Anthony_ and Loki just wanted to hold onto the moment forever.

His lover beside him, _forgiving_ him; it was as if the clock had rewound and the Norns had blessed him with a chance to change his past and undo his mistake. It was a foolish, lovely illusion and Loki held onto it for as long as he could.

His mind was so rarely kind to him, preferring nightmares and cruelty; how could he not take advantage? 

Yet, when he felt the body against him shift, Loki tightened his hold and instinctively opened his eyes.

Loki expected to find no one, to find the empty bedroom of his apartment, he did _not_ expect to find his old bed with Anthony and to have the man’s head _truly_ on his chest.

He sucked in a sharp breath, memories finally returning to his waking mind of what had happened the previous day, and more importantly, Anthony _bringing_ him here, tending to him, promising that Loki could _stay_.

The mage brought his hand to Anthony’s cheek, cupping it with disbelief and wonder as he stroked it with his thumb, watching as Anthony’s eyes opened, clear-headed enough for Loki to know he’d been half-awake for some time. Perhaps holding the feeling close as Loki had?

The thought warmed him and he smiled down gently at his love. “Anthony.”

Anthony quirked a small smile back. “Loki.”

When Loki gently tugged him up and forward, he was delighted when Anthony complied and moved with him in order for their lips to brush. Loki closed his eyes with relief, savouring the touch and barely holding in the small whimper that wanted to escape.

Yet, it didn’t last long enough as Anthony soon pulled back.

“I’m still kind of mad at you,” Anthony admitted, making Loki wince. “But I also don't want to be parted from you ever again.” He sighed and pressed their foreheads together. “I thought you’d come back. I thought you’d give me time to cool down and then come to explain. I thought we’d yell, maybe throw a punch or two, end up fucking pretty roughly and angrily and then I’d tell you, _never do that to me again_ , and we’d be okay.”

Loki swallowed, a fresh new pain cutting through his chest. “You told me to leave,” he whispered, “I didn’t... people do not give me true chances to atone. I thought you... I thought I had finally pushed you too far.” Loki’s voice gained a hint of desperation, “I didn’t mean to, Anthony. I had never meant for it to-”

“Shh,” Anthony hushed him again, chastely brushing their mouths together. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for it to turn out like that.” He let out a heavy sigh. “Look, I need to know you trust me with your plans, okay? I need you to let me know what you're going to do. We're a team, and I can't be there for you if I don't know what your plans are.”

Loki’s eyes widened, hope and incredulity overwhelming him. “You are... you wish to be a _part_ of them? To allow me to continue as long as you are... are informed?”

“Yeah,” Anthony answered, sounding a little confused. “I’m your partner, Loki. The thing that got me so angry was that you didn’t tell me; like you couldn’t trust me-”

“No,” Loki hurriedly insisted. “I didn’t... I never thought to... I,” he felt tongue-tied for one of the few times in his life. “I have always acted first, knowing no other would side with me, barely even agree despite seeing my results I-”

“Yeah, you’ve spent centuries with the principle ‘ _it’s better to ask for forgiveness than permission_ ’,” Anthony agreed, before his gaze shifted to something open and hopeful, “but I’m not like those people. I don’t want you to do that with me. I want us to trust each other, okay?”

“We will,” Loki swore, his other hand coming to cup Anthony’s side, “never again; I swear to you, Anthony. I will never again keep you from my plans.”

Anthony held his gaze for a long moment, searchingly and Loki held his breath; his heart racing with worry and hope as he offered his promise - as he took the chance that one more person might trust the truth of his words - trust _him_.

And when Anthony smiled, it felt as if light had returned to the world. He’d been given a second chance; he’d been given a means of _repenting_.

When Anthony leant forward and kissed him, Loki held him close, cherishing the forgiveness and the touch of his lover against him once more. Loki had won his love back, and he would never let himself make another mistake that could lose him his Anthony.

**Author's Note:**

> ~~And maybe Loki is a little overly feelsy here. But, ehhhh. It just shows how much he loves Tony and doesn't want to lose him. We'll go with that. Even Tony expected him to act differently XD~~


End file.
